How to make your child understand that all speech should not be held? That all remarks are not good to make, even to amuse the gallery? A mother seems to have found the solution.
Hearing a sexist comment from her son, the furious mother decided to teach him a good lesson. To punish her teenage boy, she chose to cancel his birthday party. A decision far from unanimous…
A weekend with friends
It is online, on a parental forum, that the mother, furious and determined, came to tell the anecdote having led her to cancel the birthday of her son. However, by posting about the incident, the anonymous mum was encouraged by other parents to reconsider her “over the top” decision for many. She confided: “My son (16 years old) asked friends to review the plan for his birthday”. For that day, she rented them rooms at a ski and snowboard resort for a three-day weekend.
questions about bisexuality
After talking about the birthday, the discussion, between friends, deviates on multiple subjects. “Finally, the subject of my son’s sexuality came up,” she explained. “My son is bisexual and has dated girls and boys. He is currently dating a boy,” she continued. Indicating that she had no problem with her son’s sexuality, however, she did not tolerate his casual way of talking about his conquests, especially women.
A surprising remark
“His friends ask him about his bisexuality, things like when did he say so, when did he first date a guy, what were the differences between the guys and daughters” noted the mother. Finally, his friends ask him if he has a preference. This is when his son expresses himself in a derogatory manner. ” I have no preference. I am attracted to boys and girls equally but after dating girls and boys, I can say that women are not worth it,” says his son.
A sexist fool
Intrigued by his words, she asks him to clarify his thoughts. According to the mother, her son evades her question. She then tells him: “If women aren’t worth it, then neither am I” and tells him that she won’t do anything more for her birthday. After this announcement, her son “glares at her blankly” before she adds, “That’s what happens when you’re a sexist jerk” in front of his friends. Upset and humiliated, his son no longer speaks to him.
Too harsh a reaction
In the comments, the other parents were quick to remind the mum that teenagers make these kinds of comments all the time and while that doesn’t make them okay in any way, she could have handled the situation better. “It’s too harsh a reaction for a comment made as a joke” noted a first person. “I say this as a convinced feminist and bisexual woman in a relationship with another woman,” she added. Another person pointed out “Maybe his last girlfriend was too complicated compared to his boyfriend and he makes generalizations”, inviting him to discuss with his son so that he does not fall into misogynistic patterns.
Talking to his son
Some parents thought that canceling his birthday party would cause him to lose faith in his mother. Others thought it was odd that she was listening in on the conversation and should have addressed the issue privately. “If you think he’s a sexist jerk, explain how it happened and explore the issue,” advised one woman. Finally, some thought his behavior was even toxic. “Going from ‘girlfriends ain’t worth it’ to ‘me your mom, I ain’t gotta be worth it’ to a whiff of emotional incest,” one person suggested.