Five long years of keeping the origin of their child’s first name secret… It was a real shock for a father to learn that his wife had given their son the first name of his first love.
For five years, the new mother had never admitted that she had thought of her boyfriend by naming him as such. A betrayal for the man who, from now on, can no longer look at his wife in the same way…
A stunning discovery
Online, on a Reddit forum, the man anonymously came to ask for help with his marriage. In his message, he explained that he had never asked his wife what his ex-boyfriend’s name was, thinking that this information would not be useful to him. However, she would have allowed him to discover an incredible secret… “About two days ago, we were shopping and we met one of her friends from high school,” noted the man. “As they caught up with time, she told him we had a son,” he added. This is when the situation gets out of hand.
When his friend asks him the first name of their child, his wife hesitates. “She had a strange look on her face and told him. Then her friend replied, “You mean like your ex-boyfriend? “” he wrote. Although he did not reveal the first name in question, the young dad described the latter as “very unique” to the point of having never met a single other person wearing it. Obviously, when his wife admitted that she was inspired by her former companion, the relationship between the spouses became icy.
An eluded truth
“She refuses to talk to me about it. I feel betrayed and disgusted. It’s like a switch has been flipped in my mind and I just can’t look at her the same way.” This relationship, which began in high school, lasted two years. Just before he met his wife. “When we chose the name, she said she remembered someone from her school who had it and liked it instantly,” he continued. At this time, he does not insist on having more details.
A stupid choice
Between the two partners, from the start, things had been clear and neither of them wanted to know too much about their previous relationships. “I just knew she had a boyfriend in high school who cheated on her but I never asked her his first name and it was my fault,” he insisted. For a week, his wife dodged the subject and then, finally, she ended up apologizing “She did not think it was so serious and that I would not have accepted” he revealed. “I said it was also my choice and that she took it away from me,” he added. He also invites him to put himself in his place, if the roles had been reversed. “I was devastated and starting to feel sicker than I had expected. I told him that was one of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard come out of someone’s mouth.”
A still living love
Despite their heart-to-heart discussion, his wife still didn’t see the problem. Also, the man wanted to go to the end of the discussion by asking her if she still loved her ex-boyfriend. To his surprise, she answered “Yes”. “At that moment, I wanted to vomit. She could see that I was very upset. She smiled at me and said I should know she only wants to be with me,” he recalled. She then tries to change the subject, putting her hand on his leg. But his behavior does not pass. “I told him to take his fucking hand off me right now and answer the question,” he said.
His wife’s mood changes drastically. She urges him to “get over it” and “move on”, getting up and going to dinner at his mother’s house, adding that she will see him when he returns. “I told him: ‘If you walk through this door, then no, you won’t see me'” he commented. “She looked at me like I was full of shit, grabbed her purse and left. I packed my bag and stayed with a friend,” he confided. Now the man does not know if he will be able to overcome this betrayal and if his marriage still has a future.
Maintain the bond between father and son
In the comments, another touched dad said, “Your wife will have to discuss this and in my mind should accept that this is a problem and understand why.” Emphasizing that this would certainly take time and would spark other arguments, the matter had to be clarified at least for their son. Another man, also a father, insisted on the need to secure the relationship between father and son. “Your boy will need you more than anything, especially if you end up breaking up because of this. I don’t know anything about your wife, but making sure your son loves you and wants you in his life will be paramount if you end up having to fight for custody.