After ten years together, including six of marriage, Jacob (assumed first name) would like to spice up his daily life. How ? By having a threesome with his wife and her cousin. The 39-year-old is desperately looking for a way to convince his wife, three years his junior. In particular, he sent a letter to Deidre Sanders, the Sun’s appointed adviser, to seek her opinion. “I don’t know how to ask her” he wrote, before clarifying: “We have always been adventurous when it comes to sex. My wife likes to dress up and I love it when she does it. She has toys, whips and handcuffs. It’s heaven for me.”
Only then, Jacob would like to take the next step. This idea of a threesome came to him when his wife confessed to having slept with her best friend and her boyfriend: “She told me that she was drunk and that the sex was not so good. She assured me she wouldn’t do it again but she might consider swinging.” A confidence that did not fall on deaf ears. The 30-year-old now only thinks about that: “I’m jealous so I like the idea of doing it with another woman. It’s a fantasy that I can’t get out of my head (… ) How do I get my wife to accept?”
Doing a threesome takes preparation
For Deidre Sanders, Jacob should be able to talk about this subject without problem if his marriage with his partner is “solid enough”. The specialist, however, would like to warn him: “While sex with a third person works for some couples, it is important to make sure that you are both on board. Neither of you should be influenced or coerced. ” The coach concludes by advising him to establish rules beforehand: “You said that you are jealous, it is a problem in threesomes, free relationships or polyamory. Being intimate with a third party often highlights feelings and emotions that no one expected.”
©
